Choice, Emotional Wellbeing, Mental Health, Self awareness, Self Love, Transformation

Why forgiveness is actually good for your weight loss journey

I held onto fear and anger for so long, I didn’t realise that I was allowing myself to swallow poision…..

Old Pattern

For so long I felt like I didn’t deserve to have what I wanted – after all I was broken, I was flawed, there was something wrong with me, I didn’t look like other girls, I wasn’t as smart or as beautiful as them. My story was that as a little girl, if my dad didn’t want or accept me (the one man that should as after all I was his child) then why would anyone else want and accept – if I was perfect – or if I had been a boy – maybe it would have been different.

I spent so long trying to get other people to like me; love me; accept me – for years…..I kept trying to be everything to everyone – to be someone else – to be a people pleaser – to be anyone but me – the poision was not only the food that I was using to push down my emotions – it was the words I was saying to myself.

Then one day I woke up and realised that this isn’t the life I want – and who the fuck am I?

New Pattern

One of the very first lessons in my transformational weight loss journey was FORGIVENESS.

It was also one of the hardest- I went through and wrote out every name of every person that I was upset at or angry at or who had hurt me.  I acknowledged it – released it – accepted that I couldn’t change the past.

Then I realised that it isn’t about everyone else.

If I didn’t forgive me, how can I stand in this world and make a difference?

I am who I am – unique – extraordinary – lushious – beautiful – silly – caring – strong – stubborn – with weaknesses and broken pieces – however that is all a part of me.
Time to forgive myself – for the self hate – the pain – the anger – what’s done is done – it is how I react to a situation, I can’t change the past.

I could however chose to put the book back on the shelf and never have the need again to open it.

FORGIVENESS

Who I am being in the world? It was time to stand up & be stronger than I was yesterday – to be responsible for me and my present & future. To be FREE to be ME – Because what you think of me is none of my business. And yes, forgiveness is something I practice everyday – with loads more compassion now 😉

So I ask you now-
How long will you do it to yourself?
How long will you continue to beat yourself up?
How long will you hold onto the past, the hurt, the pain?

STOP IT!
Let it go!
Forgive yourself – give yourself permission to forgive yourself,
it really is time…
That’s right…forgive yourself…Now xxx

Ps. I will be releasing a new meditation for sale on self forgiveness in December xx

“The biggest adventure you can ever take is to live the life of your dreams.” (3)

FOCUS, Mental Health, Self awareness, Self Love

What is your driver trying to tell you?

One of my biggest lessons during my transformational journey, has been realising that my “drive” to be ‘perfect’ – was for all intensive purposes; flawed. And that clouded my ability to accept me for me hence the driver that was striving for perfection, is what had been holding me back from moving forward.

Changing Drivers 

I learnt that it is not about having ‘all the ducks lined up in a row’ – it is about doing the best I can with what I have and sometimes I didn’t have a lot.

This drive to be “PERFECT” has destroyed me at times; destroyed relationships; destroyed jobs; destroyed my body; destroyed my dreams.

In my old thinking – I always thought:

If I just get to my ‘perfect weight’; he will chose me or he will change his mind & come back.

If I get to my ‘perfect weight’; people will accept me.

If I get to my ‘perfect’ high powered position in my career; people will respect me.

ALL of this is BULLSHIT!

And when I realised this – I realised it was time to change drivers.

Because the drive to be ‘perfect’ is the procrastination of the fear of failure…..it isn’t about what everyone else thinks or comparing yourself to them…

IT IS about you ACCEPTING you; RESPECTING you and therefore LOVING you.

Learning to drive in the other side of the car! 

  • 1st step – Stop pushing to ‘be perfect’.
    According to who’s definition? IT was certainly never mine – it was everyone else’s version and that is where the destruction takes place. So sit down and work it out – what is it that YOU have to do to STOP trying to be ‘everyone else’s version of perfect’ and just be your own VERSION- who do you want to be! Get clear with clarity! 
  • 2nd Step – It is about Progress – 1 more step forward than yesterday – 1 more km run than last week – 1 more chapter studied today – 1 more extra hug because you care. Measure your progress against who you were and what you did yesterday – and celebrate the moments of success. Get clear with clarity about your progress goals & log them! 
  • 3rd Step – Decide who you will recruit to your team of support – surround yourself with people who will have your back – YES – you need to have your own – however we are the reflection of the 5 people will spend most time around – Alignment of minds! 
  • 4th Step – Reassess your motivation of your driver – once you move fear to the back seat…ASK yourself WHY is this important? When I did that; I found my purpose. To inspire others to love & accept themselves from the inside out.

Start the car!

You will fail – what is the feedback? You will cry – that is ok; you will get hurt – you will heal; you will love – you will be loved in returned; you will lose & you will win!
And it is all worth the progress of living this life – your way! TRUST me – I wasted so much time being what everyone else needed – “I was dying to be perfect”- then I decided it was time for ME.

My little reminder quote to myself

If you would like some support changing drivers, my next pack of coaching is due for release and spaces are limited- send me a message via my Facebook while my website is in it’s final stages of construction!

Body Image, Emotional Wellbeing, exercise, Fitness, FOCUS, Passion, Self awareness, Self Confidence

Game of Bullshit -you don’t need motivation to exercise!

I get asked a lot – Where do I find the motviation to exercise?

Honestly – What motivation?

OLD PACK OF CARDS

I used to use exercise as a form of punishment; sometimes for 2 hours a day (1 hour in the morning & 1 hour at night – worst part…it was also how I dealt with stress). WE know that the medical world & science tell us that movement is vital to healthy body & a long life – yet it is not just about the movement – it is also about the what is going on in the mind……

The punishment wore many coats –

  • the food I ate to stuff down my emotions
  • the emotions I was to afraid to feel
  • the self talk and blame about mistakes I made at work or results I didn’t get – (code for the old belief – i am not good enough)
  • I was using the number on the scale as my reward

I will stop there….

The thing is – I call BULLSHIT – we all spend so much time trying to use ‘motivation’ to get results -yet if motivation really was the key & it worked – we would just do it! but because we don’t trust ourselves to do what is REALLY important & so we keep comparing ourselves to everyone else, we forget what really matters…Do you want to lose moments comparing apples to oranges – when they are both gorgeous, colourful, juicy & yummy just as they are???

WHEN was the last time you asked yourself – WHAT DO I WANT?

NEW PACK OF CARDS

The thing that I have learnt is that when you trust in yourself & you are inspired by how you feel and what you want – with no comparsion to ANYONE ELSE or their body or their shape or height – you remember that YOUR BODY is your body – it is designed differently to everyone else – and NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO – your results will always be your results – do the work….movement….exercise…the excuses stop & you start to be honest with what it is that you really want!

YOU don’t need more motivation – what you need is inspiration – and it starts with you asking – What do I want?

Where do you get it? 

Well it is different for everyone – for me – I generate myself to exercise & I use others to inspire me to exercise but the best part of cutting through the BULLSHIT is NOW I inspire me.

Feeling good on my morning jog!

MY TIPS

  1. Set goals that FEEL GOOD! THIS is your life – your body  – do what feels good – walk for 20mins 3 times per week….build yourself up at YOUR PACE! My goal is to move everyday – and my min is now movement -5 times per week
  2. Do what you want! (you will LOVE IT MORE!) I used to flog myself doing so many different things – now I do what I enjoy – jogging/yoga/hot pilates/boxing/kettlebells/HIIT & bellydancing once and a while 😉
  3. Chart your movement – I have a calender with stars/congratulations stickers which I log each time I do movement including the NIKE app for my jogging….love seeing how much movement I am doing 🙂
  4. Accountability – I love that I can log my mojo movement with someone – even if she is not with me – I know she has my back -Thanks Danni! Check her out at http://pricelesspt.com/
  5. GIVE yourself time – change it up and make it work for you! Motivation is what it is and is different for us all – for me – I know that I need to generate myself each day – like just a power station that generates and sends out power to the city each day – it comes from within the power plant….it comes from trusting you.

So trust yourself – do what feels good  – this is what worked for me and I continue to review it and change it up! 20mins of movement each day is not just good for your body – it is good for your mind & it reflects from the inside-out.

And now – I am off for my jog 🙂

Body Love, Emotional Wellbeing, Life style, Passion, Self awareness, Self Confidence, Transformation

Isn’t it time to say FUCK IT I AM WORTH MORE!?!

Last week I shared on my private page the following post and the breakthrough I had doing the work with some incredible women who I have had the pleasure of seeing transform!

I realised that it was time for me to rise up – and how much has changed AND what else I need to do to keep moving forward to continue to speak up to ensure that Self Love, Body Confidence and Self Acceptance is present in us all. 

Would love to hear your thoughts below x Thank you again for your continued support 🙂

Hehehe I love how comfortable and confident I feel theses days….corporate wear or my NYPD hoodie…it is a small thing to some…but when you have spent most of your adult life uncomfortable in your skin….comparing yourself to everyone. …feeling like you don’t belong or not good enough…this is a whole new experience for me.

Being comfortable in my own skin, no matter what!
Being comfortable in my own skin, no matter what!

My transformation over the last 2 yrs has taken time, multiple breakdowns, breakthroughs & questions. I have learnt that the more I speak up about Self Love, Body Confidence and Acceptance…..if MY doing this, I inspire 1 person to make a change for their life….for themselves…then it is worth it sharing, being vulnerable and rising up to a new level.

So I plan do so…to continue to do so as much as I can to inspire change of how we as women view ourselves. I want you to be able to look in the mirror and love and accept the beautiful woman looking back at you!

Isn’t it time to say FUCK IT I AM WORTH MORE!?!

Through the power of social media, my blog, soon to be released website, coaching and meditations (even a seminar?) I want to shift the focus of how we think about ourselves so that we can create the space in our lives to live it to the fullest…..we deserve that….you deserve that.

On the weekend, I broke a board with my bare hand and I made a promise to stop holding myself back and make a bigger impact in the world…to rise up for women to have the freedom for Self Worth, Self Love and Acceptance.

I want to continue being the best version of me…even when things are tough, it is not easy but I realised that it makes me want to continue to thrive…..to make a difference in how we value ourselves and who we are in this world.

So if my constant posting of positive and inspirational pictures, memos and learnings makes you uncomfortable or upset…great I am glad because I have given you something to think about…..plus if you really don’t like it then unfriend me…because I plan to be posting a hell of a lot more…here and at Fabulousness Unleashed!

Otherwise please come with me…help me in making an impact for more women to feel comfortable and confident in who they are…it is time to rise up above the bullshit stories we have been told, fed and tell ourselves.

It’s time to unleash yourself to the world…..are you ready? X

The freedom of being comfortable in my own skin is an amazing feeling!
The freedom of being comfortable in my own skin is an amazing feeling!
Emotional Wellbeing, FOCUS, Happiness, Self awareness, Self Love

Light Vs Dark – which side is the real you?

I know it can be hard at times, the struggle between the 2 sides – light & dark.

We worry that others won’t accept us, love us or like us as much, if we show them the dark….the sadness….the pain….the hurt – because ain’t we meant to be ‘perfect’?

Working it out from the inside….
I have learnt that being vulnerable takes courage, and the truth is….it is your story that you tell yourself that stops others seeing the whole complete & real you.

Somewhere along the line I decided that we were just meant to be the ‘one way’, the ‘right way’ – that if I got upset that it was not “nice” and when I compared myself to others, I saw that they ‘never got upset’ – so what right did I have?

However I have learnt that I have both; a light & dark side AND that is ok.

I am both strong and weak, I am both bold & shy. I feel happiness and anger. And once I stopped comparing myself to others, I realised it is my reaction to the world that matters, not the comparison or what others think of me. 

Because without the darkness, there is no light as without the light, there is no darkness.

My point is, everything exists in balance.

The moon and the sun exist in balance as does summer and winter….one compliments the other. It is up to me – just as it is up to you, to be responsible for what you show the world.

Being ALL of you, is your balance to the world. I know we spend so long focusing on our weaknesses instead of our strengths, it is a challenge sometimes to step up and to stop comparing, however it is worth it….to have the freedom of both, the fun, the focus on what is really important – your happiness!

How to change…

Make the choice…

Spend some time tonight writing down your strengths, what is important to you and focus on that! (don’t hold back…..this is your chance to move forward & create a new level of happiness and fun in your life!)

It is ok to acknowledge both sides, however it is time to stop comparing and start to honour who you are – the real you is both sides, because that is when you really shine and step up powerfully into your brilliance!

brenebrownstory
Thanks to Brene Brown for her words!

It takes practice, everyday to generate yourself as a powerful human being – so isn’t it time you started now? 🙂

Body Image, Body Love, Choice, Emotional Wellbeing, FOCUS, Love, Self awareness, Self Confidence

My Memo to YOU!

This week commencement with International Women’s Day! Everywhere I went, I saw an incredible overflow of strength, courage, love, support and inspiration – it warmed my heart but also pulled at my soul at the same time……

I wondered, why is it even in this modern era, that we can’t support, love, encourage & inspire each other everyday, do we really need reminding?

And then I realised -no, we don’t need reminding! It is everywhere – we just have to see it, feel it, do it!

I do!  YAY! Everyday – my MEMO’s on the Facebook page, do this – how do I know? Well I set it as my intention to support, love, encourage, inspire each and everyone one of you everyday. (Plus you all tell me 🙂 )

WHY? So that YOU generate in yourself, the desire, the focus, to stand in your own power and be the best version of you!

There are so many of us that do this for each other -in different forms, everyday – however I think we just forget that in the choas and craziness of life, what it looks like…So make sure if someone inspires you, tell them thank you 🙂 spread the intention for us to stand in our power like never before! It is time…..

 

SO here is my Memo to every single one of you around the world!

I want to encourage you, EVERY single one of you to STEP up, LEVEL up, STAND tall, BE proud, be CONFIDENT, be HAPPY & let’s celebrate our success, our lives, our love, our selves, with each other, not just today – but EVERYDAY!

I want to acknowledge that each one of us is unique, we bring something to this world that no one else does – yet we have forgotten that. We have gotten caught up in the comparsion, the competition, the down ward spiral of trying to please and be what ‘we think’ others want us to be, instead of being ‘what we truly are’.

STOP holding back – STOP hiding your dreams because of FEAR – it doesn’t serve you!

Look – it is not secret that for a long time, I didn’t trust myself, feel confident or love the woman looking back at me in the mirror.

YES – somedays are tough – I feel guilty for wanting more, I feel isolated because I am different, however all of that – is just part of being human -I know that I am evolving everyday and that I am not the same woman I was 2 months ago, let alone 2 years ago.

I wouldn’t be where I am today if it wasn’t for the rabbit hole, the darkest hours, the trauma, the re-build – the choices I made.

SO STAND IN YOUR POWER!

LEAD BY EXAMPLE!

LOVE WILDLY!

LIVE WITH ADVENTURE! 

HONOUR YOUR BODY! YOUR SOUL! YOUR HEART!

BE YOU!  

I want to say THANKY YOU to all of the women in the world before this era, who created a new platform for us to be all that we can be!

I want to say THANK YOU to the all of the women in the world today, who strive everyday to make a contribution – in their families, their work, their communities, in themselves!

I want to say THANK YOU to the men who love, accept and support us unconditionally to be the best versions of ourselves! (because we love that you let us do this for you too!)

I want to say THANK YOU to all the amazing women who surround me, inspire me & love me for who I am!

INSPIRATION IS ON THE MOVE!

Love

Little Miss Fabulousness

18718MCG_Selina McGarrigle kindofwoman

Celebrate, Happiness, Health, Life style, Love, Mental Health, Self Confidence, Self Love, Transformation

Jumping for Joy!

About 18months ago someone asked me; Can you give yourself permission to feel the joy in the moment???!!!??

My immediate reaction was; No!

So now I am asking you……..Can you give yourself permission to feel the JOY in the moment???!!!??

Joy

Mmm..What is JOY?

It is defined as; “a feeling of great pleasure and happiness”. Other words include – delight; bliss; rapture; glee;  and triumph!

Yet, at the time….I couldn’t understand, WHY I couldn’t I give myself permission to feel it? Through out my life (& it has become more apparent since I started my journey of transformation), I have noticed that as human beings, we stop or don’t allow ourselves, to feel certain things/emotions/reactions???

So I became to wonder…..when did we start thinking that we had to have other people’s permission to feel or NOT to feel?

So  today, I wanted to share with you some tips to explore this further for yourself – (10 mins tops I promise!)

  • Awareness is the first step….

Feelings…Emotions…Expression…Reaction…Awareness.

Acknowledging how we feel is important for our everyday living – our emotions/thoughts have a massive impact on our lives – yet we are so bound by a ‘system’ that says we all have to ‘be a certain way’. And while it is important to respect others; when did we stop respecting ourselves.

I realised that holding back and allowing the ‘negative’ thoughts/emotions; was only damaging me – no one else – because no one actually knew how I felt plus it reflected in my body (weight – insomnia – anxiety) – and in my life!

So start to just notice the emotions (now I am not saying burst out with everything all at once…no one wants a hole in the wall, should you explode)…..but just at lunchtime today…take some time to check in with yourself – ask the question; “How am I feeling right now?

  • Listen…

Next – just notice where that feeling is in your body….listen to that feeling….be aware of it…what happened today that you just dismissed? Start to listen to your self as the incredible human being that you are…..you are important…

  • Acknowledge it…

Regardless of the emotion (anger; love; sadness; joy) just allow it to be – and then “thank” the emotion for bring to your attention where you are not giving yourself permission to feel and BE honest with you – it is not serving anyone by dismissing how you are feeling. Have you ever noticed that how emotions can spread….if you smile at someone…they can’t help but smile back at you 😉

Next step…. 

This is where you start to notice a shift – it will take time…..however for me, I noticed that when I was honest with myself and gave myself permission to feel the emotion…it didn’t take long to move on to another one (ie; if I was pissed off…feeling it and allowing it to be (or writing it down…..) made room for the next emotion…I started to notice that I felt happy more than I felt sad. That feeling both is normal…every emotion is right – we have them for a reason.

NOW I do feel JOY and I can give myself permission to FEEL it – because it isn’t as scary as I thought and it actually takes less energy to feel and acknowledge than it does to shove down with food as was my previous coping strategy!

JOY is more than happiness; pleasure; delight; bliss; rapture; glee & triumph….Joy is whatever you want it to be!

Your JOY can be allowing yourself to feel happy or giving yourself permission to love & start dating again…or JUMPING UP & DOWN when you achieve that big contract at work!!!

JOY is more than just that…or it can be as simple as that….you get to decide your reaction 🙂

ACTION…

So this weekend…take some time out of your day…(yes I know you are busy; but this is a great little exercise plus 1 hour is 4% of your day..you have time to give yourself 4% of your day!)

  • Write down all of the things that bring JOY to you……
  • Then write down all of the things that are JOY to you…..
  • Then write down all of the things that you do that STOP JOY from being in you….
  • Then start to make a plan…..Reduce the inflammation in your life and make room for JOY!

For me now….JOY is every cell in my body working together to be the best version of me – JOY is Being awesome in the moment! 

This week, I have started writing in my journal again….just a few lines every morning upon waking…..

So today…I wanted to REALLY feel JOY –

Feel the joy of the sun on my skin…

Feel the joy of a hug from someone I love….

Feel the joy of breathing air into my lungs….

Feel the joy of being alive! 

So why not now…JUMP FOR JOY – right at your computer! Make it your self-expression today – to feel your own definition of JOYjumpfor joy

I would love to know what your definition of JOY is – share below 🙂

 

Oh and at the end of the week… a few photos to celebrate Little Miss Fabulousness turning 1!

Celebrate, FOCUS, Happiness, Health, Life style, Love, Self Confidence

Taking the leap………what’s the purpose??

Lately, people keep asking me the same question…………………

“How did you work out what your purpose in life is?”

Mmmm ok good question…then I find myself asking them back; “What is the purpose behind your question???”….

My Answer: The purpose is not the end goal……. it is a series of actions and results; that continue to occur as my drive to live by my core desire/values, aligns with the world.

Taking the leap……

As we have discussed before…as much as I would love there to be a MAGIC WAND….there aren’t any & it is different for everyone.

For me; I always wanted to help others; however for years I used it as a reason of NOT dealing with my own life; because I didn’t think I was worth having what I really wanted……so I will just give and give and give and one day it will all sort it self out.

(Editor’s note: You can guess of course that never happened….when you ignore something long enough….it kind of stops functioning….everything needs a little TLC).

I didn’t need a SOLID FOOL PROOF PLAN either…(I had a plan for everything…and would set myself up to fail – unconscious self sabotage…to prove that nothing I ever wanted I could get)……..this time around….TAKING THE LEAP…..I had an idea…..I did the work….I breathed (A LOT!!)….I trusted myself (for the 1st time in years) and then I let go (which was the hardest part….HELL was that the hardest part!!)….and it unfolded……

So you are asking me the purpose of it all- well I am no guru like Eckhart Tolle – incredible man! For me….it is MY LIFE – I don’t want to just exist – I WANT TO BE EXTRAORDINARY and be the  BEST VERSION OF ME; to be a contribution in the world, to inspire others to be the best versions of themselves – SIMPLE 🙂

Next question:

“Now that you have transformed…what was the purpose of it all?”

Well….firstly – the transformation hasn’t stopped…(that is why nothing worked before; because I thought I had to ‘get it somewhere’ instead of enjoying the journey); ….or a better way to describe it is Evolution -it is incredible to take in a new view point and gain a deeper understanding of the world…..and the purpose…..well….it is like the seasons; every year they show up and do what they are designed to do………better than the year before 🙂

Ok…Ok…..I know you want more……so here it is…

The PURPOSE

I want to be healthy in body; mind & heart! 

(Yes; I want to look good in size 12 jeans….but it goes way beyond that – I want it all – the connection; I want to feel good too!)

To be the best VERSION of myself I can be!

To stop hiding and live life to the fullest!

What is the purpose of that? Because I want to be fit and glow with vitality & radiance! 

What is the purpose of that? Because I want to live until I am 101!!

What is the purpose of that? Because I have so much I want to do and see in the world! 

What is the purpose of that? Because I was to inspire others to be the best versions of themselves!

What is the purpose of that? Because I want to bring compassion and service to the world!

What is the purpose of that? Because I want to be able to teach my children to be the best versions of themselves – the world is an extraordinary and challenging place at times & they will have have to deal with; and with what I have learnt I can pass on the tools to help learn to be the best versions of themselves; to make positive contribution to the world.

AND the purpose of all of this starts with me taking care of myself from the inside-out, so that I can do all of this and more while aligning it to my core values and passion. AND look it keeps going….for a long time; but you get the idea…..

Packing for the Leap! 

I had to stop running old and not-useful patterns; the same thing kept showing up – I was enjoying my life and my work – but I wanted more…..I wanted to contribute to the world in a big way – I wanted to leave a legacy and I wanted to make a living doing it……however I kept setting unrealistic goals…..so I would cancel the plans….everything had to be perfect…..

I created a quote recently – “Perfectionism is Procrastination in a Prom Dress!”

So I adjusted the approach……Switch the goals…..to a ZONE…..and change your packing approach – STOP trying to cram it all in at once….be creative!

The more I thought about it; the more I realised that, with my new insight and a new level of confidence; I trusted myself more; that even if I didn’t ‘pack it all in the one bag for the journey’, I am savvy enough to deliver & make my life work, no matter where I am.

So what is the trick to taking the leap to unleash your purpose – Unleashing your Fabulousness?

  • STOP comparing – we are all on our own journey – stop letting your ego run the show and start listening to your heart – start focusing on the people around you who inspire you and connect with them – BE YOURSELF!
  • Listen to your language – your patterns are hidden in what you say – your thoughts create your world
  • GIVE yourself permission to give to yourself…..time…it is an incredible gift & it is FREE!!
  • RECEIVE – everything exists in balance – if someone wants to pay for your coffee to say thank you; let them 🙂 (ps. you wouldn’t give back a birthday gift – so allow people the gift of giving; be open to receiving from them & watch it flow).
  • JOURNAL!! Get your thoughts out of your head – gain some clarity; focus; peace….your heart will tell you what it wants if you listen….
  • BE bold – Unleash your dreams…What is your ideal day? Ideal holiday? Ideal home? Ideal Partner? Ideal Relationship?

Your purpose should you chose to accept it; is entirely up to you! 

Walkway through reeds

News!!! It is celebration time this month……Happy 1st Birthday Fabulousness Unleashed!!! and just in time to share with you my recent photo shoot!! YAY! 

Merci to Anthony Maragou for his artist photography for this week’s blog.

Choice, FOCUS, Health, Life style, Love, Self Confidence, Transformation

Excuses – is your wolf just wearing PJ’s??….what are you really hiding from???

excuses_b2

EXCUSES!!!
EXCUSES!!!
EXCUSES!!!

Did your mum ever say that to you as a kid – 3 times in a row; when you knew you had something to do and you hadn’t done it yet……and she asked you why not?????

Excuses.….we all have them…..good; bad; logical or not…..are EXCUSES a WOLF wearing different clothing, depending on the day?

Think about it?

Is it the most common conversation you hear…if you listen….do you hear the fear we carry around…..underlying those conversations…..is that what really stops us from operating to our full potential?

I have heard some amazing and quite creative excuses as to why someone is not worthy of having what they want……..

Then I started to wonder; it is ok to have excuses….even if we use a different word??? eg: reasons…..

And Why do we have them??

What is it that holds us back from doing the thing we know we need to do or doing the thing to avoid it?

Do we move towards the pleasure OR the pain of something due to the FEAR of the unknown?

Although I like George Washington’s quote – “It is better to offer no excuse than a bad one.”

AND if you knew that by moving through your comfort zone; up to the next level, only actually took 4% more effort (which is 1 hour of your day) to reach something you truly desired…..would you do it?

If you knew that the statement of “I am just too busy” would stop you from reaching that new goal or “I don’t have enough money” – or “I have to talk to my husband”‘ could ultimately prevent you from ever really being your most incredible version of yourself…..would you stop and think about another way of doing it?

brain

I have learnt this year that it is natural that the biology of change – as we change – that we do feel uncomfortable, our limiting beliefs kick in – it keeps us from moving……what is this thing called a “limiting belief” you ask????

Well it is the belief that you create between the ages of 1 and 7 yrs old…..something happened….we decide that; that is how it is how it is going to be – our version of reality – we protect our selves…..yet – I ask you – how well are we equipped at the age of 7 to deal with the greater world outside of ourselves???

Look; I know we think we are – but it is the belief/habit that tells we are………the belief that you created as a little person….who did the best with what they had at the time – it kept you safe…..up until now that is…….

So instead of having what we want…..we sabotage to keep ourselves safe…whether that is with a diet (food); savings (spending); job (promotion); boy meets girl (relationship)…..believe me…I was an expert at Self Sabotage!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OK – right now, take look at the reason why you don’t have what you want…………

Is being safeplaying small – hiding behind the excuses, really going to get you the life you want???

If so, what are you going to do about it?

Well nothing….you are too busy….right??!!!

Well there is the choice to do something….time to flip them!

  • Step 1 – take a pen and a piece of paper
  • Step 2 – write down the 1 big thing you really want to achieve or do or place to go……
  • Step 3 – write down all the excuses of why you can’t have it –
  • Step 4 – keep going….keep writing……yes…that means writing more than 1 page….
  • Step 5 – read it out loud to yourself….keep reading……keep reading until all the emotion has gone out of it…you might laugh; cry; get angry….just allow yourself to feel
  • Step 6 – now – allow your mind to just write…..what is it that you really want and start to change your thoughts around it….

Can you sit there; close your eyes and really picture in your mind…..allow all of your senses in…smell it; feel it; taste it…….until that new belief makes you smile! 🙂 Now go write it down somewhere; a place where you will see it everyday – like your shower door or bathroom mirror…….

GIVE yourself permission to change…to have what you want….only you can do it …life is too short not too!!

Step up away from the fear – from the excuses!

You are worth it!EXCUSES

I have said it before – you can HAVE THE EXCUSE OR YOU CAN HAVE THE TRAINING – you can’t have both……

Training your mindset will change your life and it starts with you………..so stop using my blog as an excuse to NOT go for a walk/hug your wife/dream a little bigger/or tell someone you love them…… and JUST GO!

See you next time 😉

Ps. please share below what excuse you flipped….

Body Image, Celebrate, Choice, Determination, Fitness, FOCUS, Happiness, Health, Life style, Love, Mental Health, Self Confidence, Self Love, Transformation

Spring into Soul September – 20 things to think about…….

What an incredible morning!!

I am sitting here on my balcony with the sun warming my skin before starting work……..and loving how blessed I am to do this simple action; in a peaceful; healthy city; a place where I can give myself permission to just BE 🙂

(Which now as I write this; feels like I have champagne bubbles of energy floating around me!!)

You-Are-My-Sunshine

With this sunshine moment – HELLO SPRING!!!! – It got me thinking…………..how much I have noticed of late; that as a society; we have slipped back into getting lost in the negative spirals of things that aren’t in our control……

LIKE WHAT?? Well, Why someone doesn’t listen the way we want them too? OR How rude someone was to you in that line while waiting to get coffee!!?? OR Why is it always so hard to get what you want?? OR  Why after trying so hard for so long; am I not losing weight? OR Why is the service so slow? OR Why is it so expensive to buy fuel???

Theses are just some of the things I have heard of late…..Is it that we have simply just forgotten or is it that we have stopped acknowledging the beautiful world around us???? When did we start taking the most amazing gift of simply just living; of simply just being – just being us – you – me 🙂 – for granted?????

With so any different ways to “connect”with others happening at any one time…….do we really ‘connect’? I have asked this many times over the last few months, as it feels like we have lost the ability to just connect in general not just to everyone else; but to ourselves…..and sadly we have over the last few weeks lost so many incredible souls from this world and it made me wonder………

When did we stop nourishing ourselves and when it become at a cost of losing ourselves?

THE GIFT OF BEING ALIVE!

As most of you know my journey to loving myself has been a rocky road; a roller coaster and endless rabbit holes tumbles…..

So many emotions; AHH moments; changes; breakdowns and triumphs! Looking back now; I LOVE all of it – I realised that it is all part of the journey….it is called BEING ALIVE! 

Lately though there has been a significant shift to a world of contentment and peace….. of incredible gratitude to my mind and my body on how far I have really come. With so much going on in the world; I find now that I no longer want to turn on the news and see more destruction or war……..I know that I need to be more present in what I do and the impact that can have…I want to make a difference in the world; in how women see each other; how they see themselves; within themselves.

And that starts with me…I am your reflection….I know that there is a lot more to unpack; however the fear has been replaced by adventure and a balance that I haven’t had in a long time – nourishing myself in every aspect not just in food or time or money or things.

So here are a few little things that have nourished my soul; my mind and hence my body over the winter months….so a little thank you my body and my mind.

Thank you to you for reading; as I wanted to share theses with you; to remind you to love the body you are in – no matter your age; shape; gender or position in the world.

Loving you – starts within you 🙂 

  1. BREATHE!! Stop and take some deep breaths – right now – really breathe…..it is amazing 🙂 plus you will instantly feel better!
  2. BE grateful – spend 5 minutes each morning just saying “Thank you” to your body 🙂
  3. Celebrate all that your body can do!!! Work on a plan to achieve new levels of movement – whether it is a new yoga pose or jogging for an extra minute or doing an extra pushup or walking a different route to view a new part of your city.
  4. REMOVE CAN”T & TRY from your vocabulary – You’ve got this – shift your mindset….one piece at a time –  you have 1 life 🙂 enjoy it!
  5. Acknowledge your own uniqueness – there is no one else in the world who is you or like you! HOW FREAKIN’ awesome is that!
  6. Celebrate your success – share your wins – don’t be shy – how will anyone know if you don’t tell them 🙂
  7. Tell the little voice in your head to get off at the next bus stop; YOU ARE YOU – defined by your personality; gifts and contribution to the world not your weight on a scale; your shoe size or dress size! 
  8. Do something for yourself that feels good – for me this week – a massage 🙂 oh and giving myself permission to sleep in!
  9. STOP with the excuses – write down everything that is holding you back – and then read it out loud until you laugh at yourself – change the way you view the excuses – you just might surprise yourself.
  10. Surround yourself with people who will lift you up; inspire you and have your back (by the way; if people try to pull you down; you are already above their level!)
  11. When looking at FACEBOOK or Magazine – remember what you are seeing is someone’s end results – you haven’t seen the years of training; nutrition nor do you have that person’s genetics (and yes I know that it is also photo shopped as well)- so STOP COMPARING! 
  12. Recently I had a photo shoot (it was incredible!!!) I was very clear that I didn’t want any changes made – however I saw my scars and stetchmarks on my breasts in one of the photos and asked if that could be ‘touched up’ – the photographer smile at me and said “Every lady I have shot, has stretchmarks; it is a beautiful thing how women’s bodies adapt – so I can but then it is not  you”.
  13. I have discovered the fun in exercise and movement again – YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  and since I have found it again – I noticed that – it is trueno one is actually looking at me while I am exercising (OK; yes my instructor is – she is great and is helping me modify in certain moves so I still get a work out but don’t aggravate my lower back) – everyone is focused on their workout – their results – SO who cares how much you sweat??!!!- it means that your body is working and moving!! Thank you body for working and moving 🙂
  14. Stop turning to food to validate your beautiful self! I know for me; for so long food was used as a reward; (childhood) So why not find something else to reward yourself with; for being you – like a sleep in or a good laugh at a movie with a friend or some quiet time outside in the sun – I also want to you look at why the food is the comfort in the first place??
  15. Give yourself permission to slow down live in the moment instead of jumping ahead……..(you know the old saying – fit your own oxygen mask first before helping others)
  16. Start valuing you; for you! – When did stop trusting your choice – your intuition???? Write a list and work on one thing a day or a week if it is too much…..trust in your choice – you chose that reaction – take responsibility for it – STARTING RIGHT NOW!
  17. Drink more water – Are you serious – YES I AM GOD DAMN SERIOUS!! Your body is made up of 75% water – replenish it – you won’t want to grab for the other things as much…..like the coke or the ice coffee or the wine….
  18. Do something for a stranger – something little – like clean out your clothes or items in the house you don’t use anymore….give them to people who needs them – offer to walk your neighbour’s dog – For me – every few weeks I pick a bin in my apartment complex and I put it out for that person 🙂
  19. Write a card or a letter to someone to acknowledge who they are for you – win – win – as you both feel amazing – or offer to babysit for a friend so her and her husband can have a date night……
  20. Play your favourite music – DANCE – LAUGH – BE A SILLY JELLYBEAN – SING AT THE TOP OF YOUR LUNGS! I danced around the house the other day just because and GOD it felt great! 🙂
  21. BONUS POINT – When you look in the mirror today – SMILE – that beautiful; gorgeous; sexy; incredible beingSHE IS AMAZING and all she has wanted you to do is to love and accept her just as she is and once you stop fighting with her……….you will be amaze at what starts to flow into you life……..

Please share below what you are going to do today to nourish yourself….. 🙂  I would love to know 🙂

bodylove

Next week’s postExcuses – a sheep in wolf’s clothing or a Wolf wearing PJ’s??….what are you really hiding???