Self Love

When you stop being scared….then you know you are Brave…….

PAST LIFE….journey with me back to Europe……

In my life, I have been lucky enough to continue to build, improve, align my learning/knowledge/skills/abilities/career/goals in many different arenas in this world.

At the age of 25, I moved aboard and began what would be some of the most amazing years of my life – unbeknownst to me.

I travelled many places…..met many people…saw some of the most awe-inspiring features of this world!!!

At times I was afraid….so scared….. and then so excited & happy…….have you ever had those moments where you were completely out of your depth???!!! 

As a little girl I had wanted to travel.. so bad…to click my heels 3 times and be in a new places….to learn….to indulge….to feel the sun on my skin to see if it was different….to fly in a hot air balloon…..to be amazed by things that I had only read about….and this has not changed as an adult; I want to do the same thing still……click my heels 3 times and explore the world…..however…for now I am just going to explore why I am so scared in this moment.

MEMORIES……

One of the most amazing times of my life was when I lived in Europe working as a Nanny. 

I loved it! It wasn’t work…it was love…it was passion….it was my purpose and commitment at the time…to be a part of these little people’s lives….to encourage…to empower…to love….to nurture them to be confident in who they are in this world. To be a team with their parents….to be of support to their parents so that the family unit was strong…loving…fun… and connected. 

As a Social Worker in Child Protection this wasn’t something you saw much of…..so as a Nanny – the caregiver/provider I was able to do this and be so much more. 

The reason for the title of this blog, is that it is a statement that I used to say to one of my little ladies, who for the first 6 months of my care of her……was extremely shy….frightened of the world and unsure of her steps each day and was too afraid to have fun…..at times she reminded me…..of me.

So I decided that I wanted to give her the best I had, to slowly nourish her soul and body and mind to trust her eyes in this world so that she could stand tall and be who ever she wanted to be….being the youngest, she was the ‘baby’ of the family; however she wanted so much more and yet would tell me all the time that she was ‘scared’; ‘afraid to be alone without me’, or ‘when you go, the new nanny won’t love me the way you do”.

My time with all of the children I cared for was precious and a privilege; yet this little lady made this statement to me in my first few week….and I was determined to help her find in herself her words and courage to be a little girl who was brave and proud of herself. 

Do you remember when you were little and something frightened you so much that you were frozen to the ground….or you didn’t want to open your eyes in the dark….or you would hide under the blankets because of the storm…the thunder…the lightening….would ripple through your body…..so you stayed completely still, until you were sure it was safe to move? even though the storm had passed?

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Each day our routine was similar and I used to say to her everyday when I picked her up from school – “It is lovely to see you!!” and give her a big hug – I never asked how her day was….I let her tell me in her own time….and if she didn’t that was ok too. She began to walk a little taller…skip…smile more…take a step or two ahead of me…..she trusted that she could.

Within a few weeks her teachers approached me and said that whatever I was doing…to keep doing it…She was interacting more with the other children; playing with different toys; she has stopped crying when they asked her to do something & they believed it was because of the way I was with her; my warmth; my approach; my style…I had a ‘presence’ her teacher called it. 

I wanted to show her how to have FAITH in her words…her abilities….her instincts….so when she was scared…I never dismissed it….I would couch down to her level and hold her hands and say: 

“It is Ok to be scared….be scared…..so that you know when it stops…that’s when you know you are Brave“.

It was just my style…my way of being and it gave her something to focus on…….she knew I would still be there…..however she had faith and trust in who she was….a brave little person. 

PRESENT DAY.….

For me of late….I have had to remind myself that my word for me (MY DESIRE/MY NEXT STEP) is FAITH.

FAITH in myself……TRUST that my message…my purpose….my service to the world is unique……..it is time to bring out some of the projects that I have been sitting on for years……..and not let my fear – the messiness….the craziness…..the pressure…..get in the way.

For so long, I have been going through the motions…..I don’t want to just wait anymore…..I want more meaning in my life….I want my excitement back!

Yet, my Perfectionism; it has been my tag line for years!! It has been the one thing that has held me back from being my potential. TO BE ME…TO BE BOLD…TO BE BRAVE…….because I am scared….I am worried about judgement….rejection…..distraction….

One of my mentor’s the other week, Carl Massy http://www.worldsbiggestgym.com/carlmassy/ made the suggestion to stop describing myself as a ‘perfectionist’; stop being a ‘perfectionist’! It has stopped me from making effective progress in my day for long enough….in my projects….in my sense of worth……OUCH……it is true……and the more I stopped using the word…..and just did a ‘great job’ or a ‘great project’ or had a ‘great conversation’….the pressure shifted.

It is time to close the chapter…end the story of the fight…..

Write the next chapter Little Miss Fabulousness….it is Ok to be with the fear…“nothing is perfected until it is completed”!

So then I went and did a little detective work…and did a little more reading and I came across another beautiful lesson from Brendon Burchard – Live. Love. Matter. – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iEsJsH6Jz-o&feature=em-subs_digest

SO FOR NOW………

As we all continue to learn from many places; sources; reasons; elements each day…I am reminded that I need to nurture my inner little girl with some fun!!!

I am reminded of my little lady in Europe…..because we did have some fun together….we learnt from each other.

So to all of you – the children….the mentors….the friends….my inner child….thank you for moving my inner awareness once more.

I am Ok with the fear….and then just do it – being brave is all part of the experience……

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Ps. Thanks to Anthony Maragou for his creative photography in this week’s blog – http://www.parisianphotography.com/

3 thoughts on “When you stop being scared….then you know you are Brave…….”

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