I don’t know about you…….but I can’t stand it when people tell me not to panic!
Really – the last word you hear is ‘panic’ and telling me not to do something – well the rebel in me is going to want to do it because you said not too!
When we Panic – we don’t make rationale or logical decisions…… Panic is an emotional response – flight or fight.
Right now – the fight in me has gone…. and I just want to fly – because you know what…it looks like heaps more fun!
A beautiful Soul Sister said to me the other night – “It is Ok to want to run to your destination as long as it is you running towards your desire and not away from what you don’t want to deal with”.
Sometimes you know you are on the right path; yet in the very pit of your stomach; you realise that you can’t be everything to everyone and I am choosing not to stay this way to please others. And has I have said many times before; If you aren’t comfortable or like who I am then that is OK too – you can leave at anytime – the door is to your right….just don’t block the traffic.
Lessons from Fairy Tales….
In the past we had Fairy Tales or Fables, to help us learn how to guide our morale compass. The Big Bad Wolf in Little Red Riding Hood – don’t talk to strangers……(or was he misunderstood over the years and was craving acceptance to be loved for who he was…??) .
How about Little Red Riding Hood; could the Wolf have been her spirit….her internal dialogue? When she wanted to hide from the world…or maybe run free….she turned into the Wolf……????
Everyone has their story and it depends at the time of your exposure to it – how you relate to it.
Recently; I saw the adaption of Maleficent; the Evil Witch in Sleeping Beauty – this version showed that she was misunderstood – a broken heart; a burnt soul; wings of self expression destroyed – it takes a lot to heal that and yes – it was her reaction to the betrayal that created her new persona – yet she also realised that she could control her response – change her reaction and heal……she also, through the learning from another; was able to uncover what love really meant for her.
So you realise too that; in all of theses stories – power is not evil – you can be calm and feel powerfully grounded – even if you are wrong; you can acknowledge this – grow from it. Then we learn that when you push against your soul connection and force it to be something it is not -or to look a certain way or to be a certain way that doesn’t align with you; that is when you are turning against your inner desires and things stop working.
So my point is – I was afraid for a long time; I was afraid of the “Wolf”/”Maleficent” in me – and then I wasn’t…. – because the Big Bad Wolf was just misunderstood……the emotions and the reactions I was having – were misunderstood.
Recent realisation…………a BIG HOLY SHIT MOMENT!
Look lets cut through the Bullshit – I know most of us have something that we don’t like about ourselves – I am not sure when it started or why it happens…..or what you don’t like….I personally think everyone is beautiful because there is no one else like you!
I know some people; they think they have a crooked smile; or they don’t like their nose or they feel that their eyes are too small… And even though we may get upset about our imperfections, they don’t interfere with our daily lives.
However in all of my transformational journey, the learning’s and experience about my feelings around my body; it wasn’t just about my self worth or imperfections that I saw…..It was recently pointed out to me that there is a disorder that for some people their real or perceived flaws consumed them for hours each day and prevent them from living………and HOLY SHIT – I realised that this had been me…..
Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD).
According to the Better Health website (Victoria government): it can be defined as-http://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/bhcv2/bhcarticles.nsf/pages/Body_dysmorphic_disorder_(BDD)?open
“Body dysmorphic disorder (BDD) is a mental illness in which people constantly worry about the way they look. They may believe an inconspicuous or non-existent physical attribute is a serious defect. Consequently, they may stay at home or keep their appearance hidden. Treatment includes cognitive behaviour therapy (CBT) and antidepressant drugs.”
I had been so ashamed of myself – my body – some days I was at a loss of what to do……hence further information advised of……
- Can’t control their negative thoughts and don’t believe people who tell them that they look fine.
- Their thoughts may cause severe emotional distress and interfere with their daily functioning.
- They may miss work or school, avoid social situations and isolate themselves, even from family and friends, because they fear others will notice their flaws.
- They may even undergo unnecessary plastic surgeries to correct perceived imperfections, never finding satisfaction with the results.
For years; in my head – (I felt like I had the Big Bad Wolf inside of me at times) – there were times that for days on end; I would isolate myself because of my ‘flaws’; and when people said you are beautiful – for me – they were lying; my negative thoughts were out of control and yes surgery did enter my head – I wanted to completely change the defected body I thought I had.
You see the thing is; no one talks about this – not one Doctor when I told them of my thoughts and feelings – the downward spiral; acknowledged that this disorder even existed – I was just depressed/fat/lazy- (Please note; that depression is a part of it; so please seek out support).
It is only recently that I have discovered what this is all about and how occurs for some on a very extreme level.
I was also told that “Eating disorders are just more extreme versions of the exact same issues that we all have with eating. Technically everyone who struggled with their weight has disordered eating in some form or another.”
If you would like read more about what is being done; check out the link below from the USA:
Acknowledging the Big Bad Wolf; she was misunderstood……
I am so grateful for this new knowledge and the incredible opportunity to not only heal myself through new techniques; I know it is not an easy process and for others the journey has been and will be very different.
I have been able to create a shift in beliefs; my values and with daily habits of self-love – to move forward….I am no longer afraid of the Big Bad Wolf – she is pretty cool – she walks beside me now; instead of in my head – AND now; the more I learn; the more I can help others through their journey of self realisation.
Look – some of you will disagree; and some won’t know what to say – all I know is that issues like Eating Disorders/Depression are not something that people talk about – it is almost like we are afraid….afraid that we won’t know the ‘right thing to say” or “what to do” – but you know what – the biggest gift in my shifting out of the fear and into the flight – to SOAR in my life – was someone asking me – “isn’t it time for you??”; they listened; acknowledged and then showing me the tools so that I could take 100% responsibility for myself and my life – it wasn’t easy – but now; as I continue to learn; evolve and gain more knowledge – there is no looking back!!!
Ps. Including……a photo shoot!! and I can’t wait to share them with you!! Some will be for my website and others will just be for me 🙂
As some of you may have read; recently it was announced on my Facebook Page of my exciting news and the amazing opportunity that my journey has taken me on!!
I am now working as a Client Service Manager for My Mind Coach…… http://mymindcoach.com.au/welcoming-selina/!!!! Now I get to serve others to help get them where they want to go in life; so that they can love themselves and shine brighter than ever! Just as the incredible Kylie did for me 18 months ago 🙂
Words can’t express how my life has changed and the overflow of gratitude that I have for her support and encouragement to take a leap and soar!
Watch this space!!!!